BXP Focus

Because the Cult of Farage can’t organise something as simple as a schedule of meetings, they have hijacked Leavers of Suffolk and are using Leaver of Suffolk Meetings as a way to conduct their clandestine activities. At the next Ipswich Brexit Party Leavers of Suffolk meeting in Ipswich. They are having a campaign training event.

They are very excited about their campaign app called Paraclesis and the renegade Tories amongst them believe it to be better than the app used by the Conservative Party. But as they have no experience of using our canvassing app, they obviously think they know more about it than they actually do.

Early version of the app?

The way BXP subscribers talk about Paraclesis, it sounds like it was created by the same people who created the Raston Warrior Robot. They believe it to be the most devastating political campaign tool ever devised. They believe that it is the ultimate weapon that will allow them to destroy Boris Johnson, bring in a Lib/Lab coalition and protect Nigel Farage’s EU pension by stopping Brexit as is in accordance with their wishes.

The BXP’s Weapon?

The training session where they learn how to use this technological terror is to be held at the Thomas Wolsey at some time. But unfortunately none of them have been stupid enough to tell Agent K, who they previously gave a tour of their base to, when the next Brexit Party Leavers of Suffolk meeting at the Thomas Wolsey Pub is. Though we are aware of when the next Brexit Party Leavers of Stowmarket meeting is which is run by a Brexit Party Tory activist. We presume that the next Brexit Party Leavers of Stowmarket meeting shall also involve training on how to use this most frightening piece of software.

As the average BXP subscriber doesn’t understand the point of canvassing, they’re hardly going to understand the point of a campaign app and may inadvertently unleash it’s infinite, vaporising power on themselves.

The Ipswich cult of Farage wanted Tony Gould to be the parliamentary candidate in Ipswich but instead, the board of directors of BXP have put him up in Hertford. Their candidate in Ipswich is Nicola Jane Thomas. After a couple of months of her being selected, Ipswich BXP subscribers and supporters are still trying to work out who the bloody hell she is. Only one of them has met her. It has not been ascertained if she’s ever visited Suffolk or not and by all accounts, she is just a name that will be on a ballot paper. I have heard that she supports Lexit, which means that as BXP subscribers in Ipswich tend to be to the right of Genghis Khan, the attempt at anything that resembles a campaign by them should be interestingly hilarious.

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